Problems with my dad?? Advice please.?

Alright, so my dad is a really great guy and I love him very much. However, he has a tendency to lecture and nag about every single thing in every single minute of every single day. I'm not even exagerating. It's gotten so bad that's its at the point where I can't have a conversation with him without being harped on. It can also be about anything from forgetting to turn off the lights to not riding my horse. I've had three emotional breakdowns so far where I have cried and cried after the pressure mounts up and it just gets to me. After these, the nagging seems to stop for about a week and then it picks up again right where it left off. I really cannot take any more of this. I will go insane. Please don't say it's just what dads do because I guarantee you this is way beyond normal. How can I get him to stop?Problems with my dad?? Advice please.?
I know this may be hard to do, but try to ignore it when he does it. Just tune it out. I know this may sound weird, but some people just do not know how to communicate well. I do not think he really means to hurt you when he does this. I think that he is just on auto pilot, and just keeps spewing bile, as my Granny used to say. Try not to take it personally. And when he starts going off, just tune him out some. Mentally, take a step back, and just say to yourself, ';here he goes again!';, and just nod and say stuff like- oh yeah, I'll take care of that, and OK, dad. And just move on. He is not likely to listen or even know how to change how he communicates. If he is a good dad in other ways, maybe you can find a way to de-personalize his rants, and separate it from the good parts of your dad.Problems with my dad?? Advice please.?
Hello there. Sounds like you have an Irish banshee in your ears. (1) You are right about 'all dads nitpick.' They do because it is like purging by fire. In his head he's trying to make you the best [young] woman that you can be. (2) Seems a harsh question to ask, but - - are you a bit absent-minded on everyday stuff? Such as turning lights off; care of the horse; chores; school work??? (3) If so again, he is just trying to make you better. If someone: a dad, a mom, friend did ';not care'; about YOU they would not say a word. (because they don't 'care' ). I have picked on a zillion girlfriends in my life, all for their betterment, and encouraged them to do ';constructive criticism'; on me, also. Destructive criticism is just hateful, bad picking. IF someone (Dad) is doing it ';to make YOU better = they Love you. And be Buddhist about it. ';Action follows Thought.'; When you hear him criticise, ask yourself - hmmm, did I forget to dump the trash? If so, go dump it, go back to dad %26amp; say ';Sorry about not getting to the trash earlier, but I just took it out..';


Then, ANTICIPATE. If some of his remarks are the same every week, e.g.- the horse, light off, homework, then Duh, do them and ';Let him know you did them.'; Say ';See dad, I'm getting better huh ! '; Try that and see if he doesn't tone it down.


IF that doesn't work confront him in a ';friendly way'; and say ';You know dad, I have a difficult time handling your verbal crtique of my life. Could we please compromise? How about you make a checklist, put it on the frig, and I'll try my best to handle your requests. Deal ? ';


Hope it helps !
well, I am a young dad 35 yo my dauther shes 12 now and I love her Big big ..... as much as your dad loves you !


what u said helped me also understand that she will not apreciate me nagging and lecturing ! but this is in our blood, its because we love our daughters.


Now my advice is to give it the time and acceptance, dont do a stupid move to harm his feelings, an arab proveb says :


Love the heart, that hates you, BUT, Never hate the heart that loves you.


G.Luck
OK my dad is not that bad but he does like to nag. I don't know how much I can help you but I will try. Maybe you could try to sit down with him and tell him how you feel. I know things are bad but you never know.I hope this will help you some.
Nope sorry my dad has the record for being the worst nagging parent on the planet. Driving to the 7/11 was a major undertaking according to him. He would actually lucture on how much pressure to place on the gas pedal of the car in order to properly back it out of the driveway...and lord help you if you backed out wrong...you'd get another lecture when you got home about it. Of course that is IF you lived long enough to get out to the car in the first place. After the gas he had to discuss letting off the brake. Then putting the car in gear to go forward, to how much speed you should build up before stopping at the stop sign at the end of the street and the precise moment to turn on the turn signal to indicate a right hand turn to get onto the next street. Yes it was THAT bad. It's a wonder I lived long enough to actually DRIVE a damn car! What to do? Nothing. Just stand there and nod, learn how to occupy your mind with something else.
Don't let it get to you. My dad doesn't even know me that well or knows what he talks about. He always makes his own assumptions about everything (especially me) and just flat out makes statements in a fake voice. That's all he says and the only way he says things but at least your dad doesn't look down on you. he just wants you to be better.
My mother use to be the same exact way! Still now she kind of is like that. I did cry a lot and thought when I turned 18 I would get a job and leave. But I turned 18 and didnt. I think you should do what your dad nags about. Do things exactly how he would want them to see if that prevents the nagging.